Know that with everything you do you have to love yourself first. Before anything else or anyone else. You are stuck with yourself for your entire life, why not work to create a healthy and loving relationship with yourself. Even if you aren’t who you want to become just yet.
Ralph Waldo Emerson once said “It’s not the Destination, it’s the Journey”. The destination that you have in mind for yourself may keep you motivated, maybe it gives you the self-control you need to stay on your path; but remember that there are beautiful things to see as you make your way there.
In the fall of 2019, I got out of what I now can see was a very unhealthy relationship. At the time, I felt like my whole world was crumbling and the destination I had set for myself was instantly gone. What came from all of this, though, was a new destination for myself; self-love.
To see how unhealthy the relationship was while I was in it was almost impossible. I ignored red flags, I put up with things that I didn’t like, and overall I was extremely unhappy. I was being manipulated and was completely unaware of it. Leaving that person in my past was the best thing that I ever could have done for myself. I found the courage to acknowledge that I was more important to myself.
Working on myself has been a slow process but overtime I could see the progress I was making. While I may not be in shape to the standard I would eventually like to meet, I still started to love the way I looked. Growing up I always loved dancing, even just for fun. In high school my friends and I would have impromptu dance parties. It took healing from that relationship for me to realize that I was so unhappy before that I had stopped dancing.
The night I finally felt like myself again, felt free again was something I will never forget. I was getting ready for bed and listening to music when the song “Unwritten” by Natasha Bedingfield came on; I began to dance and sing around my room. When the song was over I came to the realization that it had been almost 3 years since I felt happy enough to dance and sing like that. I immediately had to share my joy with one of my closest friends and to hear her so happy for me made me even happier. Even now, months later, when I hear that song, I remember the joy of becoming myself again.
Today I am happier than my past-self could have ever imagined I would be. I still don’t know where my life is going, or even what my next destination is, but I am enjoying my journey through life and loving myself more than I ever have before.